Castlemaine isn’t your average country town. It’s not quaint. It’s not sleepy. It’s not “five years behind Melbourne”, if anything, it’s five years ahead, just in a direction no one saw coming.
This is the place where Melbourne’s overstimulated thirty-somethings flee to “slow down,” only to launch three side hustles, a pop-up market, and a podcast about soil health.
The People
You’ve got four main species:
Old goldfields locals – Speak fluent bush banter, know everyone’s family tree, and could name at least 20 ways the town’s changed “since the Woollen Mill closed.”
Tree-changers – Arrive in a Hilux full of IKEA boxes, start saying “Mount” instead of “Mount Alexander” after six weeks, and loudly declare how nice it is to finally live somewhere with “community.”
Startup dreamers – Open niche businesses with great Instagram aesthetics but no customers. (“It’s an artisanal oat milk refill station for puppies. No, we don’t take cash.”)
Multi-hatters – Somehow run a pottery studio, a carpentry business, and an event management side gig all out of the same garage.
The Scene
Castlemaine has more cafes than traffic lights, and every second person works remotely, which is code for “sitting in a café with a laptop and ordering one coffee every three hours.”
The music scene is a mix of folk, punk, and an odd genre where everyone has a banjo but insists it’s not bluegrass.
If you’re into food, you’ll find sourdough, organic farmers markets, and enough craft beer to make you wish for the good old industrial taste of a VB.
The Weekly Pilgrimage to “Spendigo”
Despite all the talk about buying local, half the town is in Bendigo or the outskirts of Melbourne on a Saturday afternoon. You’ll see them at Bunnings, Kmart, and Aldi, loading the ute like they’re prepping for the apocalypse. It’s cheaper, okay? Just don’t try to value your time at more than $10 an hour.
What Keeps People Here
It’s not the weather (freezing in winter and way too hot in summer). It’s not the job market (you may end up working for beer).
It’s the sense that you’re part of an ongoing experiment — a blend of history, ambition, failure, and wild creativity. It’s the kind of place where your neighbours will help you put up a fence and then invite you to their kombucha-making workshop or wife-swap party.
Castlemaine is not for everyone. But if it’s for you, you’ll never leave. Or you’ll try to leave and find yourself mysteriously back here within a year, starting an organic dog treat business and arguing over the best bread at the farmers market. Castlemaine – come to breed and break up!